By My Side neighborhood parenting group

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Thanks, 

The Parenting Program

Notice: If we win:

How will the 50K be Used?

Budget Notes: Special Events, decorative updates, and any program supplies

$ 34,000 Windows and installation

$ 8,000 Huge Ceiling fan

$ 2,500 Bathroom rennovation

$ 3,000 Repointing the exterior

$ 2,500 Repair the wall/ceiling main space and kitchen roof

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Well, once again this blog had been neglected!!

Guess I'll never make a living at blogging. LOL

Here we are at the end of January already! Time sure does fly when you're having fun!

The fall seems like a very far distant memory. It was exciting to have Yvonne, Wendy & Nicole try their wings at running the 10 week Discovery Group for the 4-8 year olds. Gotta love giving parents the opportunity to explore their own talents in the pursuit of providing an educaional experience for their kids! They did a great job & learned alot about what it takes to facilitate such a series.

We often focus so much on the child's growth & development that we tend to forget that we parents are growing right alongside. Each phase of a child's growth offers new challenges and requires us to learn new ways of relating to that little person we once knew as an infant.

So many of the kids that have been coming to playgroup as babies are now entering the "terrible twos". Parents fret at the sweet, mild-mannered, innocent toddler who all of a sudden is pushing, grabbing, hitting & asserting themselves in ways never seen before almost overnight!!

It changes how we see ourselves as parents and requires a new skill set to handle the power struggles that will occur. What is comforting is seeing that you're not alone and that this behavior is totally normal. Being firm, consistent & developing awareness of not engaging  in the power struggle is key to riding it through. Much easier said than done. The talents of learning how to re-direct behavior & allowing tantrums to run their course is a balancing act that requires practice. Nerves get frazzled and children will push you to the limit or at least give it a good try.

I like to tell my parents that the "terrible two's" are just a practice run for adolescence! You should see the looks of horror that statement can bring!!

 It's that wonderful dicotomy of seeking self-identity & independence while still needing the security of the caregiver.... push & pull at the same time.....ebb & flow.

You learn alot about yourself during these stages....what pushes your buttons, how well you manage frustration, how patient you are or are not, how well you manage your own anger, how you react under pressure, etc. 

My children taught me an awful lot about myself over these 37+ years and continue to do so. "Parenting" is a verb, an action word...there is nothing passive about it!

I still have parenting struggles with my grown children. It doesn't end. Once you're a parent, you're a parent for life!!

I once had this fantasy  that when children become grown & begin their own independent lives that my job was done. My fantasy went even further as I pictured how grateful they would be for all I had done to get them to that point. I'm over it !!

What I have learned is that the parts of parenting I am most proud of are the things my children will never know I did and that's how it should be. I don't want to be the News Anchor, I'm more the producer off to the side that no one knows who gains satisfaction from a segment well done or agonizes over one that didn't go so well. Either way, I will continue to learn & produce those segments because that's what I love. My contract has no "opt-out" clause!

I'm always so happy when we have visitors at Playgroup. Often seeing us through their eyes is refreshing and informative.

A friend of mine, Janice had helped in the final preps to get Playgroup up and going in our new space.

She spent one of her Sundays off from work, cleaning everything we have (which is alot) for about 4 hours.

I talk alot about the Parenting Program with my friends.....celebrating accomplishments, venting frustrations, sharing worries/concerns and telling the stories of all the cute moments.

Well Jan decided it was time to come see for herself the other day. She hung in the perimeters and just watched.

Later that day, we were talking and she told me how impressed she was with what she saw. Jan has worked in childcare situations over the years so she has some things to compare us to. She is also a Mother, Grandmother & Great-Grandmother.

What impressed her was the ability of all these young ones to be in the same space and have little, if any, conflict. She loved the way they moved from one activity center to the next...doing a little bit of this and a little bit of that. The interaction of the parents with each other and the children was another thing she marveled at. "They were great", she said. "Even the 2 new folks you had show up just jumped right in and looked like they'd been coming for a long time!" "I was really amazed! The atmosphere was just awesome. I never saw a place get cleaned up so fast. Even though the parents did most of the putting away, the kids did help! It was cool watching how they got into Circle Time and how they all sat together for snack. I really enjoyed myself and the next time I come, I'm gonna play, too!" "Now I see what you're talking about and I can understand why you feel so strongly about what you do!"

Seeing is believing!

Hi, All!

What a whirlwind since April!! Glad to report we are now settled into our new digs at Atonement and playgroup is rockin'!

The new space had some water damage problems that needed to be addressed so we could do wall repair and such to get it ready for the families.

May was spent dealing with building issues....getting a new downspout intalled (figured out that the missing one was causing most of the damage) so we could start repair work., many hours scraping off old plaster/paint, sanding down windowsills, giving everything that moved a squirt of WD 40 (oh, how I love that stuff!!), replastering, painting, cleaning & such.

On the other side of May at Summerfield we were busy holding playgroups and eventually packing. Jeannie, my right hand, was MIA in May (could be a song)...aceing her CNA class at the Red Cross. Congrats, Jeannie!! We're very proud of you!

Thanks to so much help from parents sorting & packing up to my very supportive husband who spent so many,

many hours making the walls look beautiful again to our dear friend Ron who made sure the electrical runs were up to code to one of our fathers, Bill Mullenhard who brought and assembled scaffolding  so we could get to the ceiling, to the guys from Brotherhood Mission who did the hard work of moving all our stuff along with Jeannie's husband, Anthony and the great crew of parents (Maggie, Ashley, Susan & Julia) who helped us unpack and set up to my friend, Janice who gave up her Sunday off to help clean and put the finishing touches together so we could welcome folks back Monday, June 8th, we made it! Also thanks to the church folks at Atonement who donated time and some of their nursery items to realy make the new space kick!

I most thankful for everyone who had to deal with me over the course of the past month who showed patience and understanding for my passion to get this done and get back to normal schedule! Amazingly, we only missed 1 playgroup the last week of May and 3 the first week of June!

Whenever a program moves, there is concern for how many folks will follow to the new location. As Jeannie and I busied ourselves Monday, June 8th setting out the feast for opening day, we wondered who would show. How delighted we were to welcome 19 families opening day!!!

Seeing folks come in and watching the children's delight at this new, large space was totally awesome!! Finally enough room and areas for various activities and ages!!!

I am so grateful to all who made this possible!!!!

So, if you haven't made it to Fishtown's premier playgroup space yet..c'mon down!!!

We'll be waiting for you!!

Stay tuned for expanded programming in the fall!!

Happy summer..

OMG!! Can't believe I've neglected this blog for so long!!! time flies when you're having fun.

So, this is day 3 of the 90 degree weather and I'll try to get this done before my computer starts having a meltdown.

Playgroups have been growing by leaps and bounds!! (just got another call from a new family coming tomorrow that met us at the Shad Fest in the middle of writing this)

It is not unusual these days to have 15+ families in attendance.

Our parent lending library through PECC (Philadelphia Early Childhood Collaborative) has been open and available for about a month and a half now...business so far is very slow. It is at Atonement Church, 1542 E. Montgomery Ave

Our Parent Advisory Council has kicked back into gear somewhat...finding a time that works for everyone to meet is quite challenging but we'll keep at it. They held an egg-cellent Eater Egg Hunt fundraiser where I totally enjoyed being the Easter Bunny!! They raised about $600!! Way to go! They've also been so useful in cleaning toys and more!

Our Fishtown Branch of the Free Library stays open along with all other Libraries...we fought the good fight! Now, let's make sure everyone continues to use it!!

So, if it is April, it must mean big changes in store for the Parenting Program.....we are so aligned with the seasons!!

It was just about 2 years ago this month when we started talking about taking the program independent and this time last year, we were planning the move to Summerfield.

Due to some space issues at Summerfield and our incredible growth, we will be moving to Atonement Lutheran Church at 1542 E. Montgomery Ave before June 1st......aarrrggghhhhh....moving AGAIN! This will be the third time I have moved this program in 5 years and hopefully the last time for quite awhile (if ever!). It's kinda funny since, when I first started with the program while it was under The Preschool Project, we were at Atonement..so we'll be coming full circle!

Being at Atonement will give us our own permanent space with our own kitchen and bathrooms and open up innumerable possibilities to grow programs and our ability to fund ourselves...very exciting! We will be upstairs in the gym with lots of light...YEAH LIGHT!!! and the space is more than able to accomodate our large numbers comfortably.

We very much appreciate the folks at Summefield Church for the space and time we have spent there and now it's time to move on!

Well, meltdown is starting to occur so I will sign off for now! Stay tuned and I will try to do better at keeping up with this!

Happy Holidays to All!

The months of November and December have been full of twists and turns.

The Phillies won the World Series, we elected our new President and then...BOOM!!...Mayor Nutter announced the need for budget cutbacks and the joyous mood of celebrations and hope were dashed to the ground in a split second!

The announcement by the Mayor that our Fishtown/Kensington area was going to loose our Fishtown Community Library, our Engine 6 and our pools was too much to believe!! While we were not the only neighborhood experiencing this, the triple hit we took left us devastated and angry. 11 Libraries were targeted for closure and we were one.

The neighborhood immediately jumped into action holding rallies and meetings to stay the execution of these vital services. The struggles continue at the writing of this entry.

I am so proud of the many families from our program who have stepped up to the plate, especially in support of our Library.

Folks came with strollers and toddlers to City Council Hearings, rallies, marches and meetings to put pressure on to stop the madness. Many letter and phone calls to our officials were also delivered as were petitions with over 4,000 signatures.

A group of local citizens immediately began to meet, calling ourselves The Fishtown Community Library Committee and have been working tirelessly to form & execute strategies that have led to meetings with the City, the Free Library and the Friends of the Free Library to work on solutions.

Especially in these economic times, a place like the Library is even more necessary than normal! Our community needs the access to free resources that this institution provides!!!

As of today, there are 2 lawsuits that have been filed to stay the closure of the 11 Library Branches. Our Library Committeee has also drafted and submitted, along with New Kensington Community Development Corporation (NKCDC), a proposal that would give the current Library building over to the Community for a $1 a year lease, initially under NKCDC, so we can create the Fishtown Community Learning Center.

In addition to these cuts, many other programs and services across the City have suffered severe blows. One is our sister program in Frankford. Having been part of the Frankford Group Ministry for years, it was announced about 2 weeks before Christmas, that they would need to find a new home as well. Due to loss of many programs that were housed in the building such as the Curfew Center, the SCOH program and others, FGM can no longer afford to keep the building open past Dec. 31st.. They will be downsizing tremendously and the Frankford Parenting Program will move under Methodist Children and Family Services to be able to keep operating at least with Parenting & Anger Management Classes.while re-grouping. The future of playgroup in Frankford is "iffy" at this time. What a loss to that community!!

So, while there is much unfortunate news these past 2 months, there is also a renewed sense of community committment and networking that I have not seen in quite awhile.

What's the old addage? "When the going gets tough, the tough get going!"?

Stay tuned for our next update! We are "going"!!

Good Grief!

Can't believe I haven't written in this since June!!

It was a busy summer getting settled into our new digs at Summerfield and such. Playgroups have been awesome! We have been welcoming an average of 2 new families per week. The day groups have about 8 - 10 familes.

Our Halloween party hosted 22 families! Good thing we have the larger space!!

This week has been especially stressful with the word of our Fishtown Branch of the Free Libary being targeted for closing.

We're all trying to find a way to keep this from happening. Allison, our librarian and The Friends of the Fishtown Library have been working hard at trying to secure more programming such as The Preschool Storytime Fun we are currently partners with them on forTuesday mornings and now this.

While I totally am sensitive to the global economic troubles we all are experiencing, it doesn't make sense to me to close a place where people can go for free. We need more of these kinds of resources to make up for the tight budgets families have. When you can't afford to go to the movies or to the Museums, etc. the library is an awesome resource.

Some of our parents expressed how disappointed they would be if they couldn't go there to take out books, DVD's and such that they can't afford to buy!

It is heartwarming to see the community coming together to look for solutions! I hope we can avoid this loss!!

The Parenting Program continues to grow and our hope is that we will be more financially stable in the coming year is spite of the economic turmoil. Grassroots support is what has kept us going and more of that is what we seek! We have served over 100 families this past year on a shoestring budget!!

We're working on an event for March '09 that would reunite some former Parenting Program folks and introduce them to some new ones.

The history of The Parenting Program is an incredible one and a story we want to tell! More about this later.

SAVE THE LIBRARY!!

What a busy few weeks it has been!!

Little did I know when I wrote the last entry that, within a few days, I would receive a phone call that threw our move into high gear.

We had been planning since earlier this year to re-locate. Although we loved the space we were in at Woolston, we knew they were planning to move and that the building was up for sale.

Thanks to Pastor Dan Roth and the board of Summerfield Church, we found a space with them that we could afford and planned to move sometime mid-late June.

The phone call I received a few weeks ago changed our time frame rapidly as we were told we needed to be out of Woolston by the end of May! I was panic-stricken!!

I despise moving and moreso when it comes on me quickly!

Thanks to all the hard work and cooperation of the families in the Parenting Program and my right hand partner, Jeannie Gnoza, we pulled off packing and moving in record time!! Over 10 of our families spent our last playgroup at Woolston sorting & organizing for the move. Not easy to do with little ones "helping out"!

We are grateful to the folks at Summerfield Church, especially Tracey Golden who is a former Parenting Program participant and secretary at the Church, for getting the space ready almost 3 weeks ahead of schedule!

The move took place on May 29th.

Thanks go to my husband, Mac, who jumped in at the last minute to be our driver for the truck we rented when the person who was supposed to do it didn't show. Many thanks also to Steve, one of our Dads, and the guys from the Brotherhood Mission who, along with Maggie & Kristen, our Moms, got us loaded up, transported, and unloaded in under 2 hours!!

Throughout this process, I am so grateful for all the support shown to me personally from our families from heartfelt regrets at not being able to do more to patience with me as I sent "HELP!" emails and playgroup schedules shifted to the phone calls and emails reassuring me that we could get this accomplished.

One call in particular from Julia really helped me stay grounded and focused. She shared with me how much it has meant for her and her daughter, Grace, to have found such a welcoming comunity at playgroup. How adjusting to being a "Stay-at-Home Mom" was difficult after being used to working and how talking with the other folks at playgroup helped ease her tensions about what was "normal" and what to expect.

It made packing those last few containers more meaningful.

We had to cancel only 3 playgroups to get this done.

It was wonderful to be able to welcome our crew back to playgroup yesterday! I was a little nervous about how everyone would feel about the new space and how the change would affect the children.

I am happy to report that, outside of a few confused looks from the kids, we were back to our routine quickly.

I was standing outside waiting to make sure everyone knew they had the right place when Juliette and Caspar pulled up. Caspar was all smiles and Juliette shared that he got so excited when she told him they were coming to playgroup or "P-Pup" as he calls it. "P-Pup" was born from singing the "Clean-Up" song. When I took them down to the playgroup room, he just stood there staring for a few minutes trying to figure out the deal...same faces, same toys but somehow different. Ruby had a similar reaction as did a couple more of the little ones but, by the time we got into Circle and started singing our songs, especially "Monkeys jumping on the bed", we all felt better.The space was different but we weren't! It was so obvious that the security of the routine of playgroup, like routine in other ways within families, truly helps very young children adjust to change!

By the time we were working with Play Dough, life was back to where it should be in playgroup world. For the 10 families that were there yesterday, the adjustment has begun.

We anxiously await introducing the rest to our new space!

It just goes to show that our playgroups are not so much about the space we are in but that we are in it together!!

A great feeling to have in this sometimes crazy, mixed up world!

Hello, All & Happy Mother's Day!

Welcome to spring! I must begin by welcoming my newest Granddaughter, Madeline Clare who arrived on March 7th! She is already a playgroup regular!

Life in the program has been quite busy. We have started doing a monthly "Coffee & Catch up" parent's night out event. We have completed our first season of The Family Theatre Series, we have had a "Sign With Me" Workshop, Infant/Child CPR course & are currently offering a 4 week Stress Management Course.

Of course, playgroups are continuing.

Not bad on low budget!! Thanks to all those who support us!

We have also started to help establish a playgroup for an organization called "KidZone" located at 71st & Ogontz. This is a great first step to expanding the playgroup/parenting program concept further across the city.

We have welcomed many new families! It's great to know what we do is needed and wanted in this community.

We'll be celebrating our first year anniversary in a few months. It seems hard to believe that it's been that long already!

A great big thank you for allowing me to get to know you and the children in your life. I look forward to meeting more of you!

Onward and upward!

Teri

I am working part time as the Social Worker (don't really like that term, I consider myself more of an advocate) for the Frankford Group Ministry's Neighborhood Parenting Program.

It was a strange turn of events that brought me there. I'm one of those people who believe everything happens for a reason, so bare with me. First and foremost, I wish to welcome the folks from Frankford to our site. I am pleased to offer info on both programs!

Many moons ago, these two programs were one. In 1995 they split into two seperate locations and under two different organizations. Since then, both have had their triumphs and their struggles. Funding always mandating what can or cannot be done sometimes gets frustrating.

Although those of us who have been around in these programs over the years, know how important a resource they are for families, the quest to make a case to funders is sometimes difficult. They want to see proof of results. That is totally understandable! If I'm going to give money to something, I want to know that it is benefitting those it serves.

Coming up with hard numbers to prove that a person may be a better parent for having participated in our program is tough. How can we prove that maybe we helped someone learn coping tools that meant child abuse didn't occurr? Yes, we can do some surveys on child development (and do from time to time) but they never really tell the whole story. They don't show the friendships that are made sometimes lasting for years, they don't really show that a child who has attended playgroups has an easier time in school down the road, they don't measure self-esteem and so on. They do measure some attitudes about disiplinary practices, knowledge of milestones in child development, etc. But the way we really can show how this works, is by your telling your story! I implore you to go to either our guest book or our forums and share some of your thoughts!!

We need to get the word out that what these Parenting Programs do besides providing invaluable adult/child playtime and activities is build stronger communities by building stronger families. Every neighborhood should have one!

I believe it should be a parent's right to know that there is someplace to go with your child where you feel welcomed and supported. A place where you can get information about how your child grows, some tips on how to handle different stages, talk with other adults going through the same thing, build relationships and give your child a good start. The importance of learning to socialize in a positive way has been under-rated. We know that early good socialization skills lay a solid foundation for success in life in every way and the lack of them breeds all sorts of difficulties in getting along in this world. The violence on our streets can be greatly dimished when people know how to get along with others! It's really that basic if you think about it.

It is my hope that this re-connection of these two programs will enable us to have a stronger voice in calling for every Neighborhood to have a program such as ours. Money invested in this simple approach to supporting those who care for our young is a good use of dollars! It nmakes a difference!!

I may be a little prejudiced here but I believe if the folks really understood what Neighborhood Parenting Programs do, they'd be lining up to fund us to the level we need to really fly!